Aloha Bitches!

So this post is a couple of months late but whatevs. I figure I need to tell everyone about Hawaii because it was just the best trip ever. You should go, seriously.

The botanical gardens and tropical plantation:


My good friend Mary was getting married to Paul. I'm not so sure that I believe in soulmates but if I did, they would qualify. They've been together forever, share a love built on friendship, and are just the most accommodating, caring, and inviting people I have ever met. When I got the pretty blue invitation asking for my presence in Maui, I was in. I needed to get away. I needed this for me but I wanted to be there for them:


I scored an amazing deal on my Kihei condo through vrbo.com. I stayed in a gorgeous 1 bedroom, 2 bathroom unit right across from the ocean. Unfortunately, when I was dumping my camera, the goddamn thing crashed and I lost all of my photos of the interior so here's the link to where I stayed. The unit was listed for sale at $550,000.00USD - that should just about tell you how nice it was. The link does it no justice. It was equipped with everything and the hostess was just amazing. I also scored 1/2 price airfare through Westjet and got an amazing deal on a Mustang convertible. I was set to binge on lavaflows and fresh fish. Mission accomplished.

The beach across from the condo, Iao Valley through the vog (volcanic fog):

The Kamole Sands grounds:On the south side of Maui, Ahihi Bay with the rain coming in, Molokini in the background:
A bunyan tree in Lahaina:
Stuck in traffic, I look to my left and see this on the side of the road:An enclosed rain forest den of serenity on private property:

Me at 10,000 feet - the Haleakala crater:The Wailea Golf Club where the wedding was held. This was where the reception was held and quite possibly one of the most beautiful places on the planet:
I took over 600 photos but since blogger takes 6 hours to post each one, this is all you're going to get. I'd go back in a heartbeat, even with the 12 hours of traveling in a tin can above the ocean packed with screaming children and a 6 hour time difference.

But I digress. *sigh*

do not adjust your computer monitors...

For the first and probably last time I venture into the kitchen this year (yes I realize it's January) to cook dinner, I made the one and only Kraft Dinner. I was craving it, found a box in the cupboard, took a deep breath, and turned on the burner. I boiled water. I added noodles. And it turned out like this:

WTF?!? I realize I have no business being in a kitchen, have no use for the stove or food preparation in general, but hell - I can read directions! How does one turn KD orange? It tasted like ass too. Booooooo!!!!

Oh, I take no responsibility for the ugly plate. It's my roommate's. All of my nice stuff is being enjoyed by spiders and dust bunnies while it sits in storage waiting for me to do something with my life.

On the other hand, I was promoted at work! Woo hoo! Although unfortunately my raise is not high enough for me to hire a cook. *sigh*

living in a cellular world...

I hate cell phones. I hate standing next to someone in a grocery store yapping about their Friday night plans and being so rude to not even get off the damn thing to pay the cashier. I hate driving next to people who are too busy "like so, whatever" on the phone when they should be, imagine this, DRIVING at a consistent speed, and preferrably in their own lane. I hate listening to obnoxious ringtones while in the movie theatre, library, or coffee shop. Well, maybe it's ignorant rude people I hate, not the cellphone, but whatevs.

That being said, they are a necessity and I have made the move to abandon my landline. I am officially one of those people although I am a respectful user and will just leave it at that.


My current phone is 3 years old, randomly turns itself off, has about 5.7 minutes of battery life per charge, and occasionally just decides that it doesn't feel like making that call right now. Unfortunately, these occurances are no longer infrequent so I'm looking for a new phone.


Of course, I'm dying for a new iPhone to go with my new iMac but since it hasn't arrived in Canada yet (and I'm sure when it does it will be about 1/2 my annual salary to buy), I've been looking at other phones. While doing so, I got nostaolgic in thinking about my phones over the years. Let me take you on a journey of my cellular world. My very first cell phone:





The Nokia 252 in yes, woodgrain (my mom picked it out). Full analogue baby. It was a decent phone for emergencies only. It did its job. Look at the size of that thing! It's like a brick/2-by-4 crossover.

My next phone was the Motorola 2260, otherwise knowns as the peanut phone. Completely not user friendly, had a stupid blue condom thing on it, and was generally just a huge pain in the ass. Needed a freaking NASA engineer to add a contact. The reception was shit even if I was standing next to a tower. From what I can tell, Motorola phones still aren't user friendly. Boo! I hated that stupid thing.

My current phone, the LG 1150 kicks ass. Until recently, it's never given me a problem, it's totally user friendly, and I like it. The problem is it was so rare that I can't even google a picture of it in my color. In the US, it was released in navy. Here it was sold in silver. To apparently about 5 people. But I liked it then, and I like it now. But compared to the new phones, it's an antique. So I'm looking at new ones.

So for my next poll, which one do you guys like best? Based solely on looks of course. I've lready decided that these phones have the features I need and the reviews have been decent. So, whaddya thing?

Siemens SL75






Sony Ericcson s500






Samsung u600 Samsung u700


The 2 Samsungs come in a dark, slate navy blue too.

So, your comments/thoughts/reviews would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!

happy birthday chloe!

she covers my clothing in puff with pride. she can school a kong with any stuffing in under 30 seconds flat. she sleeps like it's a sport. she's bitchy, stubborn, and selfish but only because she knows she can be. she prefers the -20 degree weather to balmy spring conditions. she smiles. to her, i am second only to food.

chloe is 7 today. seven. when i got her she weighed 2.5lbs. now, she's pushing 16lbs although i swear half of that is puff. she has followed me through 4 different moves without ever complaining. she adapts to any situation including road trips. when i come home she welcomes me like i've been gone for a month. when i'm home, she follows me like a shadow. she wants for nothing and asks only for milkbones. happy birthday princess puff!

the "10 dogs with spots" theory...

i'm not going to lie to you, i am not good at math. while i quite fondly recall saying, "when the hell am i ever going to use this stuff?" in high school (and now realizing that i got to the ripe old age of 29 without actually using most of it), i did struggle.

today i got this in an email:

which made me laugh so hard because i am quite confident that i actually put this on an assignment in mr. eaton's legendary grade 10 math class. the class where the same kid was sent EVERY DAY to the office accompanied by the entire class singing "na na na nah, na na na nah, hey hey hey, good bye!" the same class where ashley and i were allowed to write our tests together because our combined efforts were still hit-or-miss on a passing grade. the very class where the "10 dogs with spots" theory was born. allow me to explain.

mr. eaton posed the question: 10x - x = ?

now, the correct answer is 9x. mine and ashley's answer was 10. our explanation? if you have 10 dogs with spots, and you take away the spots, you still have 10 dogs. made sense to us. i think mr. eaton thought we'd make great trailer park wives one day.

are you rotting inside?

tv has no shame. not that it did before but my god. i just flipped past an infomercial discussing how our digestive systems are rotting and that is why our farts and breath smell so bad. no, i'm not kidding. as i type this, they are now discussing the size, consistency, and formation of bowel movements. the visual of a loaf surfing through the g.i. tract was especially pleasing.

yesterday, i attended a session on bill 51 at the oakville convention centre. nice place, good session, lots of important info, go to see some ex-OMB staffers and catch up. it was good. the drive home, not so good. it took 6.75 hours to get home. it took only an hour and twenty minutes to get there, and that was during morning rush hour. people were running out of gas and just abandoning their cars in the middle of lanes. it was horrendous, ridiculous, and road cleaning crews from halton/peel region need to take some lessons from york region. 'nuff said.

omigod...

they have made special K with chocolate. now THAT is the best diet food i have ever heard of. in canada, we get special K with strawberries. in the USA, they get chocolate. i call foul.

my weekend sucked. all of my plans to go jetsetting, clubbing, and having a life again in ottawa were scuttled. so instead i watched a one-hour special on lindsay lohan (wtf?), lost iq points by endulging in flava of love 2 (totally worth it), and did laundry. meh. waste of a weekend.

my blogging has been lacking lately. probably more or less a state of mind but i'm losing interest in it. probably because my own life is bland and i really have nothing to say right now but meh. i'm going to blame in on february and all the blahs that come with it. but also probably because i can't really say what i want to. my own fault for not making it anonymous. so bear with me while i figure out what to do with it. maybe if/when something worthwhile actually happens, then i'll have some content.

ttfn...